Page:Steadfast Heart.djvu/65

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THE STEADFAST HEART

come next, for that anything save unpleasantness could come next did not occur to him. His life had been a constant looking forward to the unpleasant…. If, in his short life, he had ever looked ahead with pleasant anticipation, it had not been to the happening of some gracious event, but negatively, to the non-happening of the disagreeable. So he remained passive, waiting, his brain confused, his face stolid.

“Well,” said Browning to Wilkins and Trueman, who had come forward with congratulations, “what’s to be done with him?”

Wilkins shot a glance at Trueman and his eyes twinkled mischievously at the pastor’s embarrassment; at the evident struggle taking place inside the good man to face the situation…. He could not compel himself to lift the burden. It was too heavy, and he turned away his head, with a feeling that he was betraying the high standards of his calling; that he was scantily exemplifying the teachings of the Master which he taught by word and sought to teach by the example of his life…. But, to take this boy into his home—he could not; his own children were there—the influence!… the example!… the association!… And public opinion.

“Wilkins,” he said with emotion, “I can’t do it—I can’t.”

Wilkins’s eyes mirrored his respect. At any

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