THE ASSEMBLY OF GRAMMARIANS. 313
you may send for a workman for a small matter. Ch. I might do that, but I want materials. Al. What say you, are there no woods in this country I Ch. All the woods in the Elysian fields are destroyed. AL In doing what? Ch. In burning heretics' ghosts, so that of late for fuel we have been forced to dig for coals in the bowels of the earth. Al. What, could not ghosts be punished at a less charge than that? Ch. Rhadamanthus, the judge, would have it so. Al. If it be so, when you have got a boat where will you get oars? Ch. It is my busi- ness to steer, let the ghosts row themselves, if they have a mind to get over. A L But some of them, never learned to row. Ch. I have no respect for persons kings and cardinals row with me ; every one takes his turn as much as the poorest peasant, whether they have learned to row or not. AL Well, do you see and get a boat as cheap as you can; I will not detain you any longer, I will away to hell with my good news. But, soho, soho, Charon. Ch. What is the matter ? Al. Make haste, and get back as soon as you can, lest you be smothered in the crowd. Nay, you will find at least two hundred thousand upon the bank already, besides those that are paddling in the lake. Ch. I will make what haste I can, and do you tell them I shall be there presently.
THE ASSEMBLY OF GRAMMARIANS.
Albinus, Bertulphus, Ctmthelus, Diphilus, Eumenius, Fabullus, Gaditanus.
Al. Is there anybody here that understands arithmetic? Be. For what ? Al. To cast up exactly how many grammarians there are of us. Be. That may be done without a counting- table ; we may count upon our fingers I count you upon my thumb, myself upon my fore finger, Canthelus upon my middle finger, Diphilus upon my ring finger, and Eumenius upon pay little finger ; and now I go to my left hand there I count Fabullus upon my thumb, and Gaditanus on my fore- finger, so that, unless I am out in my account, we are seven of us. But to what purpose is it for us to know that ? Al. Because, as I have heard, the number seven makes up a complete council. Be. What makes you talk of a council ? Al. There is a matter of moment that has puzzled me a long time, and not me alone, but a great many other men of no mean learning ; I will propose it that the question may be decided by the authority of this assembly. Ca. Sure it must be some knotty subject, that you cannot decide it yourself, Albinus; or that it should puzzle you that are of so penetrating a judgment. Therefore we desire to know what this difficult matter is. J speak in the name of all the rest.
Al. Well, then, do you all be very attentive, applying both your ears and your minds. Two heads are better than one. Is there any one of j r ou all that can explain what is the meaning of this word, antico- marita? Be. That is the easiest thing in the world, for it signifies a kind of a beet, which the ancients called a water-beet, having a knotty- wreathed stalk, very insipid, but of a very stinking smell if you touch it, so that it may vie with the bean-cod tree. Ca. A natatile beet, do
