Jump to content

Punch/Volume 147/Issue 3815/Old Style and New

From Wikisource
Punch, Volume 147, Issue 3815 (August 19th, 1914)
Old Style and New
4257233Punch, Volume 147, Issue 3815 (August 19th, 1914) — Old Style and New

I.—Old Style.

He. Has anyone seen the paper?

She. I haven't.

He. Didn't it come this morning?

She. Very likely not. The boy often forgets it. You're the only person who ever looks at it.

He. Well, I suppose I must wait till I get to the Club; but I dare say there isn't anything that matters in it.

Or

She. Have you done with that paper, my dear?

He. Absolutely; there's nothing in it. There never is. I can't think why we waste money in taking it.

She. Then perhaps I may have it for a pattern?

He. Why, certainly. I've no use for it.

II.—New Style.

The whole family (all together).

Has the paper come yet?

What’s the news?

Where's the paper?

What about Liége?

I say, where's the paper?

Isn't the paper here yet?

What's the matter with the people?

Or

The whole family (all together again).

I say, father, you might read quicker.

Can't you tear it in half.

Do tell us the news.

Do read it out loud.

What about Liége? Quick!

Oh dear, why don't we have ten copies of it?