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Punch/Volume 147/Issue 3824/A Royal Cracksman

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Punch, Volume 147, Issue 3824 (October 21st, 1914)
A Royal Cracksman by Jessie Pope
4258229Punch, Volume 147, Issue 3824 (October 21st, 1914) — A Royal CracksmanJessie Pope

When the housebreaking business is slack
And cracksmen are finding it slow—
For all the seasiders are back
And a great many more didn't go—
Here's excellent news from the front
And joy in Bill Sikes's brigade;
Things are looking up since
The German Crown Prince
Has been giving a fillip to trade.

His methods are quite up to date,
Displaying adroitness and dash;
What he wants he collects in a crate,
What he doesn't he's careful to smash.
An historical château in France
With Imperial ardour he loots,
Annexing the best
And erasing the rest
With the heels of his soldierly boots.

Sikes reads the report with applause;
It's quite an inspiring affair;
But a sudden idea gives him pause—
The Germans must stop over there!
So he flutters a Union Jack
To help to keep Englishmen steady,
Remarking, "His nibs
Mustn't crack English cribs,
The profession is crowded already."