Punch/Volume 147/Issue 3831/Our Mighty Penmen
(In acknowledgment of the services of some of the gifted representatives of "The Daily Mail" and "The Daily Chronicle.")
Correspondents, though banned at the Front,Are so manfully doing their "stunt" In searching for news That the Limerick Muse Thus honours their skill in the hunt.
The despatches of Mr. Elias Are so laudably free from all bias That their moderate strain Has given much pain To the shade of the late Ananias.
K. OF K., who by birth is a Kerry man, Much approves of the work of Z. Ferriman, For it holds the just mean That's betwixt and between The extremes of Cassandra and Merryman.
For news that is fresh from the spot Commend me to great ALan Bott; The stuff that he wires Stokes our patriot fires Without being ever too hot.
The despatches of good Mr. Perris Have the flavour of syrupy "sherris;" They enrapture the mind Of the sane and refined—Especially Ellaline Terriss.
In Rotterdam city James DunnKeeps his vigilant eye on the Hun, And fires off despatches In generous batches, Like a humanized 15-inch gun.
It is futile to cavil or carp At Sir Alfred, whose surname is Sharpe; For he soothes us or stings As the nightingale sings, Or as angels perform on the harp.