Songs and Lyrics (Lehrer)/The Vatican Rag
THE VATICAN RAG
words and music by Tom Lehrer
First you get down on your knees
Fiddle with your rosaries
Bow your head with great respect
And genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!
Do whatever steps you want if
You have cleared them with the pontiff
Everybody say his own
Kyrie eleison
Doin' the Vatican Rag.
Get in line in that processional
Step into that small confessional
There the guy who's got religion'll
Tell you if your sin's original.
If it is, try playin' it safer
Drink the wine and chew the wafer
Two, four, six, eight
Time to transubstantiate.
So get down upon your knees
Fiddle with your rosaries
Bow your head with great respect
And genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!
Make a cross on your abdomen
When in Rome do like a Roman
Ave Maria, gee it's good to see ya
Gettin' ecstatic an'
Sorta dramatic an'
Doin' the Vatican Rag.